Friday, 2 February 2007

Roller Coaster (emotional posting)

Its only 10.00am here, I can not believe today has already been filled with so many emotions. I am trying to pretend that I do not have a cold and mornings are quite tough, especially the getting out of bed when my youngest is wide awake at 5.30am. Anyway we made the school run, I was driving home over the hills and just burst into tears. I stoped in a little place with great views over the Moors and the canal, the blue sky made everything look so pretty. I cried some more. I drove home sat on my drive way and cried buckets! It was my Dads birthday last week, he passed away over year ago now and I thought I was doing quite well emotionally. (I sadly watched him die of cancer) I think because I was so busy last week I guiltily pretended to myself that it was not a problem. I wanted to photograph the Moors and my camera is my Dads, he was a photographer and I have his camera's now. I think it just took hold of me and I needed to let it all go. So Happy Birthday Dad, you are very loved and very missed. Oh and I use your camera everyday. I love you.
If anyone is left reading, sorry! This was the activity in the kitchen yesterday. We had a friend pop round for lunch (who is about to open a photograph exhibition, very exciting) Then we got on with our baking for PTA. We are icing the cakes tonight.
Then we had some quality rolling around, Oh my little cherub.
The evening was busy and I only managed about an hour craft time, The stumbling blocks just need to be sewn on to the main baking fabric now.

This is a block that I particularly like. I am amazed I am doing this, it is actually coming together, I have five blocks now.
I have a friend and her children coming over for lunch today so I shall go and tidy up a little. Really looking forward to tomorrow as its my patchwork workshop and in the evening we have the PTA party night. I hope its a great weekend for all.


julie said...

Loosing your Dad must be so hard. One of my closest friends lost her dad a year ago on Feb 14th and she's finding this a very emiotional time too. Although time may have passed it doesn't make you feel less bereft and the emotion can bubble up when you least expect it. It's wonderful that your Dad's camera is a way of still feeling him close to you. The photos of your cherub are precious. Have a gentle-on-yourself weekend and know that there are others out there who are thinking of you and wishing you well xx

Jo said...

Birthdays are harder to get through than other days, my Mum's birthday would have been this Sunday (she died of cancer too) and even though it will be 10 years in April since she died, I could sit and cry for her right now. So please take comfort from my good wishes if you can

capello said...

so sorry to hear about your dad.

sometimes the tears arrive and we just don't know why; it's best to let them out.

i hope you have a very good weekend.

Biscuitbear said...

What a cute little helper! I miss my daughter's curls, we cut her hair for the first time when she was about 3 and the curls never came back.